Post by Icciotto on Mar 5, 2013 10:18:10 GMT -5
Springtime
by, Icciotto
Now Father Winter is receding,
Springtime is starting to poke through.
I can feel the air begin to change,
I even smell the fragrant flowers though they have yet to bloom.
The bird that sings by my window every morn when I awake,
I know she doesn't come there until the ice begins to break.
I feel a new energy inside my being,
one of starting anew!
I love the feeling Springtime brings me,
it is peacefulness...happiness, through and through.
I love to write, though I rarely share my work, but I would love to start with all of my friends here on Petzabloo! My poetry does not always rhyme, and it sometimes is quite sporadically written, however, it is always from the heart, so you may expect to see some surprises like that! ^__^
Any and all comments and critique welcome!
by, Icciotto
Now Father Winter is receding,
Springtime is starting to poke through.
I can feel the air begin to change,
I even smell the fragrant flowers though they have yet to bloom.
The bird that sings by my window every morn when I awake,
I know she doesn't come there until the ice begins to break.
I feel a new energy inside my being,
one of starting anew!
I love the feeling Springtime brings me,
it is peacefulness...happiness, through and through.
I love to write, though I rarely share my work, but I would love to start with all of my friends here on Petzabloo! My poetry does not always rhyme, and it sometimes is quite sporadically written, however, it is always from the heart, so you may expect to see some surprises like that! ^__^
Any and all comments and critique welcome!
The hardest thing about poetry(as far as I am concerned) is getting the imagery right with few words. You did this very well with things such as referring to winter as "Father Winter". It shows how winter leads to spring and for me it brings to mind the baby animals. In line four "though they yet to bloom." is kind of rough you may want to consider putting in have so it reads "though they have yet to bloom." or some other word so it flows a bit smoother like the rest of the poem. Poetry is very much a visual experience as much as it is a literary one. We read poems differently depending on how they look on paper(and it's difficult to get them right on screen sometimes). The lining it all up on the left works for many poems(including this one) but if you try different formats it may read differently and that can always be fun. All that stuff aside I do really like the poem. As I said it has great rhythm and flows nicely. I hope you share more 
